How to avoid being trite this Christmas

‘And so this is Christmas, and what have you done?’ Not a lot this year, actually. Getting things ‘done’ ceased to be the object from about March onwards in favour of just getting through. So here we are, ‘another year over’, with less than ever to show for it. Goodness knows what my mother’s obscure relations are going to put in their Christmas letters this year. Here’s hoping some second cousins thrice removed somewhere have managed to pass their Grade 3 Piano exam to give us all some good news.

But John Lennon’s is not the only Christmas song that will be sounding a little different this year. (Top marks if you recognise where they’re all from.*) ‘Chestnuts roasting on an open fire, Jack Frost nipping at your nose’ as you sit on your coats on the patio in your Tier Two area. ‘I really can’t stay…’ ‘But baby it’s cold outside…’ ‘I know, but if I come inside that will push us over the rule of six.’ ‘I’m driving home for Christmas, oh I can’t wait to see those faces’ through the kitchen window. ‘Oh I say it’s tough, I have had enough, can you stop the virus please?’

Of course, I’m writing this before publication, so maybe by December the outlook will be considerably brighter. But judging by how things have gone so far, it’s hard to shake the cynicism. It is, for better or worse (but mainly worse), my modus operandi. So much so that this piece got stuck here, at the 250 word mark, for several days. Complaining about a lack of inspiration, I read it out to my younger brother over the phone and he said: ‘See, you’re nearly there. Now all you need to do is write the little blessed thought bit and you’re done.’